I believe in miracles.
This morning, I saw a miracle.
Many of you have been praying with me this week for Naomi, my friend Ryan's wife. Last week, her heart stopped, and she was in a coma for a couple of days. This morning I went to see her in the hospital.
I was kind of apprehensive about going to visit her. As I walked into the University Hospital, a flood of memories came back to me. Entering the cardiac unit, I had a hard time swallowing back tears. The clinical smells, the whoosh of the automatic door, the hushed conversations, the sight of haggard-looking families trying to catch a few moments of rest on the hard plastic chairs.....
The last time I was there, I lost someone very dear to me, despite my fervent prayers. I became very jaded with the whole concept of prayer and healing. I was angry at God - and for two or three years after, "healing" was a sore point for me. I prayed, and I believed, and she died.
I was raised in a church environment that believes in healing, but it was always more of a concept, and not a reality. It's something I so desperately want to see - why do we not see the miracle of healing in our day and age?
I found a nurse and asked if I could leave my gift and card at the station, as it was before visiting hours, and I had to leave the city shortly. She smiled, and told me they weren't really that strict in the unit, and to go ahead and try her room.
I knocked, tentatively, on the wall just inside the door. I heard some quiet voices, but the curtain was pulled, and I didn't want to disturb anyone. Ryan opened the curtain, and as I stepped in, I saw Naomi, sitting up in bed. She smiled, and welcomed me, as though I was a visitor in her home. She even introduced me to her parents, who were also there.
I wasn't really sure what to say.
"Um, how are you?" is all I could think of. How dumb is that?! She looked so good! She totally put me at ease, and for the length of my visit, we chatted about school, teaching, and music. The whole time, I just kept thinking - this is like a dream! She could have been dead - but instead, she is alive, coherent, and seems to be well on her way to a complete recovery!
Leaving the hospital, I thought about the nature of God. I don't understand why God seems to answer some prayers and not others, but I do know that he is a loving God, and he has a plan for our lives. He has this way of taking even the most dire of circumstances and turning them around - to challenge us, to help us grow, and to strengthen our faith and our trust in him - whether that means healing a loved one, or taking them home.
Looking back over the past four years, I see the hand of God through the circumstances; how he walked with me through the valley of the shadow of death, through the pain, the loneliness, the rejection, the sense of abandonment. It's when I look back that I can say, yes, I believe in healing, because God has taken all the broken and shattered pieces of my heart, and is putting them back together. That is a miracle.
So, all this to say, thank you for praying. I know it has made all the difference for Naomi.
And I - I have witnessed a miracle.
==
Many of you have been praying with me this week for Naomi, my friend Ryan's wife. Last week, her heart stopped, and she was in a coma for a couple of days. This morning I went to see her in the hospital.
I was kind of apprehensive about going to visit her. As I walked into the University Hospital, a flood of memories came back to me. Entering the cardiac unit, I had a hard time swallowing back tears. The clinical smells, the whoosh of the automatic door, the hushed conversations, the sight of haggard-looking families trying to catch a few moments of rest on the hard plastic chairs.....
The last time I was there, I lost someone very dear to me, despite my fervent prayers. I became very jaded with the whole concept of prayer and healing. I was angry at God - and for two or three years after, "healing" was a sore point for me. I prayed, and I believed, and she died.
I was raised in a church environment that believes in healing, but it was always more of a concept, and not a reality. It's something I so desperately want to see - why do we not see the miracle of healing in our day and age?
I found a nurse and asked if I could leave my gift and card at the station, as it was before visiting hours, and I had to leave the city shortly. She smiled, and told me they weren't really that strict in the unit, and to go ahead and try her room.
I knocked, tentatively, on the wall just inside the door. I heard some quiet voices, but the curtain was pulled, and I didn't want to disturb anyone. Ryan opened the curtain, and as I stepped in, I saw Naomi, sitting up in bed. She smiled, and welcomed me, as though I was a visitor in her home. She even introduced me to her parents, who were also there.
I wasn't really sure what to say.
"Um, how are you?" is all I could think of. How dumb is that?! She looked so good! She totally put me at ease, and for the length of my visit, we chatted about school, teaching, and music. The whole time, I just kept thinking - this is like a dream! She could have been dead - but instead, she is alive, coherent, and seems to be well on her way to a complete recovery!
Leaving the hospital, I thought about the nature of God. I don't understand why God seems to answer some prayers and not others, but I do know that he is a loving God, and he has a plan for our lives. He has this way of taking even the most dire of circumstances and turning them around - to challenge us, to help us grow, and to strengthen our faith and our trust in him - whether that means healing a loved one, or taking them home.
Looking back over the past four years, I see the hand of God through the circumstances; how he walked with me through the valley of the shadow of death, through the pain, the loneliness, the rejection, the sense of abandonment. It's when I look back that I can say, yes, I believe in healing, because God has taken all the broken and shattered pieces of my heart, and is putting them back together. That is a miracle.
So, all this to say, thank you for praying. I know it has made all the difference for Naomi.
And I - I have witnessed a miracle.
==
posted by jacelyn at
9:39 p.m.
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1 comments
